In the beginning months of our glorious lives here at the PHN I started to see this girl that went to school in the city. We can skip all stupid little mushy details, because their actually irrelevant and, just well plain stupid. She was one of the nicest girls I have ever met. I know I may be contradicting myself, what with the whole title of this blog and all, but this girl was amazingly beautiful. She had gorgeous long brown hair, an ass that would make your mouth water, and eyes that that tingle the little fuzzies on your scrotum. A real bring home to mom type of girl. She was nice enough to save the world type girl. All around, this chick was a great catch.
Things started off pretty slowly, which I was OK with. We hung out on the regs, and partied together for a couple of weekends in a row. I was taking things easy, slowing down asshole mode, downshifting into NiceGuy gears, and playing it safe and patient.
We got intimate a few times, but nothing too serious…absolutely no sex L
Sad Justin
Well, I must’ve ruined it because one night while were hookin’ up, I let her know sex was what I wanted. I mean, is that too much to ask for after about a month of “seeing” each other? I think not. My buddies kept trying to convince me that she was a virgin. However, I didn’t believe this because she just didn’t seem like one. She just seemed a little too experienced in what she was doing to be a virgin. I don’t know really, maybe she was. Anyway, once that was done and over with I didn’t sweat it too much. You win some you lose some right.
A couple months later, I notice my buddy Sausage trying to make a pass at her. Maybe he was just being really friendly or maybe he was actually trying to finish what I started. I thought it was actually pretty funny. It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t have none right? Either way, I called him out on it. I let him know that as much as he was willing to try, he would probably get nowhere…as I tried pretty hard, and failed. “This girl was smart” – she wouldn’t be giving it up to anybody. Sausage insisted that he would master this challenge. He claimed he could crack this vaginal version of the DaVinci code. He was confident. As much as I admired his optimism however, I warned him.
“Don’t do it man. You’ll just fail. Her vagina's like area 51 dude. No one's gettin in there.”
He never did get in there.
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