Prologue

For the first two years of my college career, my living situation didn’t exactly permit an eventful social life. I mean, I am more than grateful for my sister and brother-in-law for housing me in their downtown condo for my freshman year of college. But heading home every weekend to work and cater to a significant other hindered my possibilities for excitement. My sophomore year was even harder on me. My school schedule was clustered in the middle of week, which meant I only had to be on campus three days. The other four days, I was commuting home and working. Finally, my junior year of college in the great city of Chicago is when the debauchery started.

I moved into a swanky penthouse on the north side of the city, on Loyola University’s campus, with a buddy of mine from high school, and two buddies of his. Now, all of this prologue isn’t to say that my life within my friends wasn’t comical, outrageous, or entertaining. Moving out of the nest to be with 3 other 20 year old dudes with raging hormones and a never ending motivation to look for booze, girls, and trouble just really….REALLY upped the ante.

My friends and I like to have fun. And we like to put ourselves in situations where the next day we think to ourselves “What. The. FUCK. Just. Happened?” On top of this, we are truly assholes. We make fun of just about everybody and we think are greater than anybody who crosses our paths (99% of the time we are. But I mean, hey, confidence is a virtue right?) We have the dirtiest minds, and even dirtier mouths.

I decided I would like share the hilarity of the dialogue I share with my roommates, our friends, and our acquaintances through actual spoken word (we have a quote board where we save our most controversial phrases), text messages, facebook wall posts/comments, and any other way we might communicate.

To kick this off the right way; here’s a quick back-story to the title of this blog. This has been long so I’ll make it short.

One boring evening, while creeping through some hot girls on facebook, my roommate WhiteRice was showing Sausage pictures of a particular girl. WhiteRice claimed that this particular girl wasn’t exactly photogenic, and she was better in real life. Sausage wasn’t buying it. In an effort to redeem his rating, WhiteRice explained that this girl was "nice."

Sausage replied “Nice usually means ugly”